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Well Matthews surgery went well last thursday.

You can see matthew’s shrek ear that was removed in the picture below:

Unfortunatly though Matthew decided he didn’t like the Steri-Strips they had installed over the wound and he ripped them out so we have to go back to the surgeon tomorrow to make sure everythings ok…

FCC Censorship
Full story at:

http://www.rollingstone.com/news/story/_/id/7047694/bobdylan?pageid=rs.NewsArchive&pageregion=mainRegion&rnd=1109512151578&has-player=true&version=6.0.12.1040

Check out the above article, it really puts the fines they are trying to levy against indecency into perspective… Why should stern continue to shock people on the radio when he would get a lesser fine for dumping toxic waste..

Thanks to the Chuckster for posting this originally, I just felt I had to share it with all

http://advision.webevents.yahoo.com/scp/viewer/index_new2.php?client_id=1172&event_id=14994

Reprinted without permission from The Salmon of Doubt, Hitchhiking the galaxy one last time b Douglas Adams…

Cookies

This actually did happen to a real person, and the real person is me. I had gone to catch a train. This was April 1976, in Cambridge, U.K. I was a bit early for the train. I’d gotten the time of the train wrong. I went to get myself a newspaper to do the crossword, and a cup of coffee and a packet of cookies. I went and sat at a table. I want you to picture the scene. It’s very important that you get this very clear in your mind. Here’s the table, newspaper, cup of coffee, packet of cookies. There’s a guy sitting opposite me, perfectly ordinary-looking guy wearing a business suit, carrying a briefcase. It didn’t look like he was going to do anything weird. What he did was this: he suddenly leaned across, picked up the packet of cookies, tore it open, took one out, and ate it.
Now this, I have to say, is the sort of thing the British are very bad at dealing with. There’s nothing in our background, upbringing, or education that teaches you how to deal with someone who in broad daylight has just stolen your cookies. You know what would happen if this had been South Central Los Angeles. There would have very quickly been gunfire, helicopters coming in, CNN, you know… But in the end, I did what any red-blooded Englishman would do: I ignored it. And I stared at the newspaper, took a sip of coffee, tried to do a clue in the newspaper, couldn’t do anything, and thought, What am I going to do?
In the end I thought, Nothing for it, I’ll just have to go for it, and I tried very hard not to notice the fact that the packet was already mysteriously opened. I took out a cookie for myself. I thought, That settles him. But it hadn’t because a moment or two later he did it again. He took another cookie. Having not mentioned it the first time, it was somehow even harder to raise the subject the second time around. “Excuse me, I couldn’t help but notice…” I mean, it doesn’t really work.
We went through the whole packet like this. When I say the whole packet, I mean there were only about eight cookies, but it felt like a lifetime. He took one, I took one, he took one, I took one. Finally, when we got to the end, he stood up and walked away. Well, we exchanged meaningful looks, then he walked away, and I breathed a sigh of relief and sat back.
A moment or two later the train was coming in, so I tossed back the rest of my coffee, stood up, picked up the newspaper and underneath the newspaper were my cookies. The think I like particularly about this story is the sensation that somewhere in England there has been wandering around for the last quarter-century a perfectly ordinary guy who’s had the same exact story, only he doesn’t have the punch line.

From a speech to Embedded Systems, 2001

so I don’t think this is a relativly new idea but I thought it would be fun anyways… I uploaded a wiki to my site, and set up an AboutMe page with the idea that I would not edit it at all. It is a place where friends and family can describe me and edit me and define me in cyberspace..

So when you get a chance check out:

http://www.far2wise.net/wiki/index.php/AboutMeWiki

And would appreciate it if you would edit the page and add some information on me so I don’t look so boring…

Lunch, the HP Way

by Stephen Harrison and Noel Magee

This is the story of a different kind. No melting CPU’s, no screaming
disc drives, just the kind of psychological torture that scars a man
for life.

I had a 9:00 meeting with my sales rep. I needed to buy an entire new
series 70, the works. He said it’d take about an hour. Three hours
later, we’d barely got the datacomm hardware down on paper, so he
invited me downstairs for lunch.

This was my first experience in an HP cafeteria. Above the service
counter was a menu which began:

MMU’s (Main Menu Units)

0001A Burger. Includes sesame-seed bun.

Must order condiments 00110A separately

001 Deletes seeds.

002 Expands burger to two patties.

00020A Double cheeseburger, preconfigured. Includes cheese, bun and
condiments.

001 Add-on bacon.

002 Delete second patty.

003 Replaces second patty with extra cheese.

00021A Burger Upgrade to Double Cheeseburger

001 From Single Burger.

002 From Double Burger.

003 Return credit for bun.

00220A Burger Bundle. Includes 00010A, 00210A and 00310A

001 Substitute root beer 00311A for cola 00310A.

My eyes glazed over. I asked for a burger and a root beer. The waitress
looked at me like I was an alien.

“How would you like to order that, sir?”

“Quickly, if possible. Can’t I just order a sandwich and a drink?”

“No, sir. All our service is menu driven. What would you like?”

I scanned the menu. “How big is the 00010 burger?”

“The patty is rated at eight bites.”

“Well, how about the rest of it?”

“I don’t have the specs on that, sir, but I think it’s a bit more.”

“Eight bites is too small. Give me the Double Burger Upgrade.”

My sales rep interrupted. “No, you want the Single Burger option 002
‘expands burger to two patties’. The double burger upgrade would give
you two burgers.

“But you could get return credit on the extra bun,” the waitress chimed
in, trying to be helpful, “although it isn’t documented.”

I looked around to see if anybody was staring at me. There was a couple
in line behind us. I recognized one of them, a guy who nearly mowed me
down in the parking lot with his cherry-red ‘62 Vette. He was talking
to some woman who was waving her arms around and looking very excited.

“What if… we marketed the bacon cheeseburger with the vegetable
option and without the burger and cheese? It’d be a BLT!”

The woman charged off in the direction of the telephone, running
steeplechases over tables and chairs. My waitress tried to get my
attention again. “Have you decided, sir?”

“Yeah, give me the double burger- excuse me, I mean the 00020A with the
option 001. I want everything on it.” She put me down for the Condiment
Expansion Kit, which included mayonnaise, mustard and pickles with a
option to substitute relish.

“Ketchup.” I hated to ask. “I want ketchup on that, too.”

“That’s not a condiment, sir, it’s a Tomato Product.” My sales rep
butted in again. “That’s not a supported configuration.”

“What now?” I kept my voice steady.

“Too juicy. The bun can’t handle it.”

“Look. Forget the ketchup, just put some lettuce and tomatoes on it.”

The waitress backed away from the counter. “I’m sorry, sir, but that’s
not supported either, the bun can take it but the burger won’t fit in
the box. The sales rep defended himself. “Just not at first release.”
“It is being beta-tested, sir.”

I checked the overhead screen. Fries: number 000210A, option 110,
French followed by option 120, English. “What the hell are English
Fries?” I turned to the sales rep. “Chips they call them. We sell a lot
of them.”

I gave up. “OK, OK just give me a plain vanilla Burger Bundle.” The
confused the waitress profoundly. “Sir, Vanilla as an option is
configured only for series 00450 Milkshakes.” My sales rep chuckles.
“No ma’am, he just wants a standard 00220A off the shelf.” I wondered
how long it had been on the shelf. I didn’t ask.

“Very good, sir.” The waitress breathed a sigh off relief. “Your meal
is now on order. Now how would you like it supported?”

“Support?” She directed me to the green shaded area at the bottom of
the menu, and I began a litany with my Sales Rep that I’ll never
forget.

“Implementation assistance?”

“You get a waiter.”

“Implementation analysis?”

“You tell him how hungry you are and he tells you what to eat.”

“Response Center Support?”

“He brings it to your table.”

“Extended materials?”

“You get refills.”

I stuffed some money at the waitress and told her to take it. She gave
me my check on three sheets of green-bar paper. I studied it on my way
to the table, and decided it’d pass as an emergency napkin.

Table? My Sales Rep had been bright enough to order us a table. He
hadn’t been bright enough to check on a delivery date. The table waiter
slouching in his corner surveyed the crowded room, looked at me and
said, “Two weeks. But I can get you a standalone chair by the window
right away.”

I handed him the tray. A woman rushed up to me with two small cups of
chili and sauerkraut for the hot dog somebody else had ordered. The
room began to grow dim, my eyesight faded…

I woke up clutching the water-glass at my bedside table. It was five
AM, four hours till my meeting with HP. I had had a vision, I did what
it told me to do. I dialed my office, and I called in sick

TEN COMMANDMENTS

The real reason that we can’t have the Ten Commandments in a Courthouse!
You cannot post “Thou Shalt Not Steal,” “Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery” and
“Thou Shall Not Lie” in a building full of lawyers, judges and politicians!
It creates a hostile work environment!

COWS

Is it just me, or does anyone else find it amazing that our government can
track a cow born in Canada almost three years ago, right to the stall where
she sleeps in the state of Washington. And they can also track her calves to
their stalls. But they are unable to locate 11 million illegal aliens wandering around our
country. Maybe we should give them each a cow.

Groundhog Day and the State of the Union Address fell on the same day. As Air America Radio pointed out, it is an ironic juxtaposition: one involves a meaningless ritual in which we look to a creature o f little intelligence for prognostication and the other involves a groundhog.

Ford Mustang

What classic “Muscle Car” are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Ok, with a new digital camera comes new pictures. They’ve been added to the gallery and are ready for your viewing pleasure. More to come as I continue to play/learn this new camera…

http://www.far2wise.net/gallery/albums.php